Gerry with a G. Still Standing. Still proud to be Sandusky.
Today for the first time in almost a year, the Jerry Sandusky story has slipped from the headlines. Because I have the name Gerry Sandusky, over the past year I’ve been called everything from a molester to a monster to a rapist. I’ve been invited to rot in hell, suffer torture, and die a slow, painful death. My children have faced ridicule; my wife has faced mockery. None of us are related to Jerry Sandusky, the convicted child molester.
I point this out because this experience has tutored me in dealing with impossible situations that I have no control over. While you may never face a situation quite like this one (believe me, I hope you don’t), you or your company will almost certainly at some point face an unfair, impossible situation that puts your good name in jeopardy.
Here are twenty lessons I’ve learned from handling large, impossible situations that you may find helpful too:
1. Don’t run; don’t hide. You can’t.
2. Like it or not, you now have a platform. Use it for good.
3. Don’t try to fight a tidal wave. Ride it. You’re first task is to survive.
4. Don’t react to ignorance, hatred, or meanness.
5. Saying “Thank you,” always has more power than saying “%$#& you”
6. Be aggressive on social media, but maintain your poise
7. Take the high road. If nothing else you will show some people that a high road exists.
8. Accept all interview requests. Those people will help you get your truth out to the public.
9. You can’t change or control the world before you change and control yourself. Start with yourself.
10. Pray for the people who have suffered more than you. Their wounds are deeper than yours and your prayers can help them.
11. Remember, it’s temporary. No one lives forever on this planet, so their problems–and yours–have a shelf-life too.
12. When it’s appropriate, laugh. Everyone’s laughing behind your back. You might as well have a little fun too.
13. Be a winner, not a whiner. Don’t waste time whining about “why me.” The world has enough whiners. It never has enough winners.
14. Learn and draw strength from the examples of others. Ghandi, Alfred Nobel, Hellen Keller, Martin Luther King, Jr., and countless others all stood up to injustice, misfortune, or bad circumstances and changed the world for the better. You can too.
15. Hating is always about the haters. It’s not about you.
16. Lean on your own life experience. When I was 17, my older brother Joe died. I have thought of Joe often over the past year and smiled, thinking I’ve survived one of the worst things life could throw at me and I did it one day at a time without having all the answers. It also reminded me that I didn’t need all the answers to handle this situation too.
17. Your problem is visible. Most people’s aren’t. Make your courage, patience, and poise visible too and you will help someone who has much bigger problems believe they can weather their storm too. Guaranteed.
18. Talk to your kids often. They hurt too and they hurt for you. Show them you’re okay, and you’ll help them be okay too.
19. Never fight fire with fire. No stupid, ignorant, mean-spirited, or hate-filled person ever chose to change because someone called them stupid, ignorant, mean-spirited, or hate-filled.
20. Remember that those who came before you left you with a good name. Commit to doing the same for those who will come after you.
When I first hear if this case against Jerry Sandusky ,I for a brief moment thought of you but quickly realized your not the monster they described. Your a good person keep your head high….time will all go away.
Pretty nice rules. So glad you and your family survived and cameout ok….thank you for having the courage to find the good in a bad and ugly one.
Gerry – I went to school in southwestern Missouri with a moron named Willie Raper. I don’t know if he became a raper but he was certainly a moron. Be well and keep bailing. (signed) James in Los Cabos, Mexico
Beautifully said!
Gerry, I’ve thought of you often as this horrible story developed. I’m glad to hear you feel like you’re coming through to the other side of this.
Keep doing the good work that you do and stay strong.
God Bless,
Ginny
Gerry,
Michele and I have always looked at you as a great example of class and a very nice man. Once again you have shown what you are made of. I am proud that we know you and that you represent a voice in Baltimore.
Thanks for all that you do.
You are A class act Mr. Sandusky.
You’ve always been a class act, always the gentleman, always professional!This is no exception. Congratulations on weathering this storm and coming away with good advice for everyone! Keep up the outstanding work!
You are handling the situation with grace and aplomb.
This name thing actually has been an interest of mine for some time.
Sometimes the name is so ruined you just have to change it. Notice there aren’t any “Hitler”s around. (I think they all changed the T to an L.
I even sympathize with the good folks of Sandusky Ohio.
I could go on, but will just repeat my admiration for your class and intelligence.
You are one strong fellow Gerry. I hope it is over and hugh your wife and kids every day.
Gerry…thanks so much…i work at the helpingup mission in Baltimore…a spiritually based addiction program for homeless addicts..I am looking forward to using your post as a teaching tool for dealing with situations we face…appreciate the thoughts….
Gerry,
It is a shame that someone who has taken pride in their name and heritage would have to undergo the scrutiny of an unrelated scandal. If I’ve learned anything this year, it is that trials and tribulations come without warning. You and your family are a class-act.
Good luck dude. Sounds like a pain, but you’ve been a class act throughout by the sounds of it. Prayers to you and your family.
Good morning, Mister! I just came across this from a post on twitter, and I am glad to have read it. I’m an entrepreneur, who is still suffering the shellshock of beginnings. It helped to read this. I’m definitely sharing this with friends, too.
Well said Gerry. Stay strong. You’re an incredible class act and have handled this mess with far more grace than most would be able to do.
“Never fight fire with fire. No stupid, ignorant, mean-spirited, or hate-filled person ever chose to change because someone called them stupid, ignorant, mean-spirited, or hate-filled.” .. in other words, don’t feed the trolls.
Good trolls are extremely articulate people with a penchant for witty drivel and a fetish for logical fallacies. Many of them probably realize that you _are_ Gerry and not Jerry, but opportunity knocks and they can’t resist. Bad trolls tend to flock to Youtube then pass out.
The positive side of this is the amount of personal growth you’ve achieved and shared with the world.
My hat is truly off to you sir. I watched this fiasco from the vantage point of an expat that grew up watching channel 11.
Your last point:
“Remember that those who came before you left you with a good name. Commit to doing the same for those who will come after you.”
… is a very good one. You might come from a line of kitten eating, unicorn abusing, goldfish eating tyrants that spit salt water on talking snails. Or, you may be heir to a throne. None of that matters, all that matters is what you do with the time you are given to make sure the name your kids inherit is a good one.
Keep going, keep writing and stay awesome.
I live in, and grew up in the Baltimore area. You were the first person I thought of, when the Jerry Sundusky story broke last fall. The way you have handles yourself this last year has been commendable. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I hope that this impossible situation comes to an end, and you and your family find some peace in the near future.
It’s remarkable how well you’ve handled this situation. You’re providing the perfect example in dealing with, as you put it, “an impossible situations that I have no control over.” These types of situations arise in everyone’s life (although rarely of this magnitude), and you’ve shown yourself to be a great role model. Keep up the good work.